Exactly

For the last ten months I have been working for my dad's small business (SWS) and living at home with my parents. I graduated with my masters of education in May of 2012 and have been ardently pursuing the job search since then. I am very blessed to be able to live at home and work for my dad, which I actually really enjoy. I can definitely see myself coming back to the family business, but I also want to venture away to experience a new place and work in the field that I have studied. I'm not sure if I will love or hate this next chapter of my life, but I know it is an adventure that I need and am ready to begin.

During this in-between time, I got down on myself a lot. It has taken me a good deal longer to land a position in my field than most of my former classmates. I often felt as though I should be somewhere else, like this wasn't what I was supposed to be doing. I learned quickly that should or shouldn't and what if thinking is in no way constructive. It's extremely destructive and makes you feel much worse about most situations. Around the time I began to spiral into these negative thoughts, I received a card from a great friend and sorority sister of mine that read "You are exactly where you need to be." I can't tell you how many times I have read that card. Reminding myself of this makes me feel more appreciative of where I am in any moment. Of course some days it is easier to believe this than others, but I think it's important to tell yourself this everyday. Especially on the days that it's most difficult to believe. "I am exactly where I need to be."

Yesterday I began sorting through everything I own so that I can pack it up and move to a new city for a new job. I am leaving my Canton, Ohio home sweet home for the east coast in just 10 short days. Initially, I didn't think much of cleaning out and organizing my stuff. Mostly I thought "This kind of sucks" and "How in the world have I accumulated SO MUCH crap?!?" Then "Stop This Train," by John Mayer played (dammit, Pandora.) and I found a box that reminded me of some college friends whom I miss terribly. Surprisingly, I did not cry (I am typically a hot mess when it comes to any type of life transition. When I was six years old I got a new bedroom set and cried for a week strait, when I got my braces on in seventh grade I did not speak or smile for three days. Like I said, hot mess).  But I was not sad that my friends and I could not be together or that I will be leaving home soon. Of course I miss my close friends and will surely miss my family, but instead of sadness I felt this overwhelming sense of gratitude. In that moment, I only felt thankful and blessed. Thankful that I have so many people that care deeply about me. Thankful that I care deeply about so many people. Thankful that my mom and dad are always there for me whenever I need them. Thankful for all of the opportunities and experiences I've had that have brought me friendships that will absolutely last a lifetime and probably longer because I think heaven will probably be a cool place to hang out. And finally, I felt so very thankful for moments like that one when you have an awe-inspiring sense of clarity and know for certain that you are exactly where you need to be.

Are you hard on yourself about where you should be in your life and what you're supposed to be doing? Are you thankful for where you are in life? What are you thankful for?

Love,
Logan